Respect...

I feel so blessed yet left alone. I feel so great yet discouraged. I feel so brave yet so small. Sometimes our Life just mess up and it sucks and pissed us off. When we are down circumstance's pulling as deeper. Is it really like that? Well, I'm afraid that's the way it is, ups and Downs with all the rollercoaster rounds.
For my friends who know me and knew the resent big tidal wave of my life, I wanna say a thank you so much for everything.
When I feel alone, discouraged and small, the true meaning of friendship really floats not to give you sympathy but to carry, and pull you out from the mad where you're drown. And eventually, human nature we sometimes don't want to be pulled out. Because we are afraid to face the pain and the consequences. We want to stay still, to wait. Come what may. It's hard to face the truth, isn't it? Shameful sometimes even to your self.
After what happen. I still believe that my reverence conquers it all. When everything's gone, one thing has to stay. The respect. when you cannot feel the love anymore and its anger that takes place. For me respect should still be there. I'm so much afraid to lose it, because I know if I lose this I'll definitely lose the memories as well. Memories which I don't want to be gone away, memories where I can see my self on it. Memories that once defeated my battle nevertheless thought me lessons how to stand up and prepared me for the other battles I'm facing.
Circumstances like this make me see the true and real essence of happiness. As this also teaches me to see the things hiding behind the back of my senses. Forgotten and was trashed. Yes, I messed up. But now I'm trying my best to clean it all.
As what my friends always reminds me that; "Pain will eventually fade and wound will be healed in time."